---
title: Already Failed
description: Well, it was supposed to be a compelling year for me to try and make some changes and be a bit more of someone who worked towards doing things I wanted to do. However, I have already failed. What do I mean by that? Well...
tags: [Personal, Mental Health]
published: 2025-03-09
url: /2025/03/already-failed
category: Thoughts
draft: false
---

Well, it was supposed to be a compelling year for me to try and make some changes and be a bit more of someone who worked towards doing things I wanted to do. However, I have already failed. What do I mean by that? Well, I was planning on trying not to spend as much, going to the gym more, and doing at least one blog post a month. With that said, I haven't really met any of those goals, and we are now in month three and have only managed to put out one blog post.

I guess to start, I will keep up with saying that work has been crazy for me lately. We are in just constant scramble mode, and I am working 60 to 70 hours a week, preventing me from being able to keep up with just about anything in my personal life. I also come home very tired, and I don't even have the energy to do much more than watch a video or two on YouTube and then fall asleep. This just doesn't feel sustainable; however, thankfully, we are hiring help at my day job, so I hope that we can eventually start to have enough people to handle the increased workload.

I guess the workload thing can be used as an "excuse" for most of my resolutions not being met so far. That said, it isn't entirely to blame, as I need to do better myself at trying to fix those habits to try and force change for the better. This week, I started being a little more hard at leaving work at a reasonable time and just shelving what I cannot get to the next day, but it doesn't stop work from calling me in if something goes very badly, and I need to jump in and deal with an on-call situation.

As for my spending habits, I eat out a lot because I am so tired after work that I don't wanna cook, but I should go back to meal prep to keep myself in a better state financially. I also need to start selling off things I don't use or need so I can focus on trying to get out of all my debts that are not my car loan before the end of the year. I want to try and prepare myself for hardship because we are kinda facing a bit of a crazy situation in my country right now.

Anyway, it at least felt good to write something and post it on my blog. Let me see if I can get back into writing and having things to chat about going forward. I want to write about my thoughts on moving off of FastMail and onto a different email provider, as they are raising prices. I am not sure I am on board with some of the things I have been following with their union members.